Dear Relationship Boy

Okay usually it takes me at least a week to write a blog but since I had no one to call and relay this absurdity to I had to take it to the pen. This blog is dedicated to the relationship guys and girls and actually a warning for those who come into contact with them. As I rode the train home I almost felt like Franny the Big Bad wolf but really I was only just being real to myself. The relationship boy is comparable to the recruit that hasn't been signed yet but has already made himself apart of the locker room huddle. They make one visit and then all of a sudden they are wearing UCLA colors and changing their profile picture to themselves in front of bear. Like chill.... we ain't on the same team yet.



1. He Tells You His Wedding Colors on the First Date vs. The Recruit That Picked His Number
I worked in recruiting for a couple of years and more than anything I hated the recruit that would watch the football game and tell me what they would do if they were in the game. Or the recruits that sit and tell me how they would wear their gear. Same with relationship boy: Now call me crazy but first dates are suppose to be fun and carefree... there should be no expectations except that of fun. Beware of those who try and get serious with you before they get to know you. And don't be tricked by his game... He isn't really gonna marry you but relationship boys know what they think girls wanna hear. If a boy hits you with the "My wedding is gonna look like this" hit him with the "Do you know when Trey Songz mixtape is coming out" Lol. I didn't do that I think I just smiled and nodded but I for sure didn't engage in that bullshit. Just like the recruit that hasn't even been offered yet the relationship boy is jumping clearly jumping the gun here.

2. Holding Hands on the First Date vs. The Recruit Who Thinks He's The Life of the Party
I'm not sure if any of you have met recruits at parties but there is nothing worse than a hs recruit that comes to a college party and acts like he is THE MAN. Like you're doing to much on your first college party. Same with holding hands on the first date(Or any date). Now I will admit a lot of my guy friends have complained that I act like a boy when it comes to certain things like holding hands... I will outright tell anyone I feel like I'm on a leash but imagine the boy who you just met asks to hold your hand on the first date. Like I'm thinking "YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ME" like why are you holding my hand. We just met! I mean really he's tryna hurry and fill in his last relationship as quickly as he can the next date ya'll will be on picnics in the beach. Smh don't fall for it.

3. The 2nd Date is a Surprised Double Date vs. The Surprise Recruit
Now I actually really enjoy surprises... However I do NOT like investing in peoples friends and family unless I like more about them than a free meal. If a guy tries to have you all up with his friends before he even knows that you're a good enough girl to bring around then he's just doing what he's accustomed to. He doesn't really like you he likes relationships and is doing what is in the book. He doesn't like you he likes the idea of you. (Yes this boy really did have me show up to a dinner for four with steak and wine smh). Compare this to the recruit pops up to parties on wednesday after wins celebrating as if he played or the recruit that if you look really closely is at your away game with her parents with the school gear on... surprise surprise!

I can't say that all jackass or annoying recruits turn into jackass annoying athletes... however a lot do.... and I can say that all relationship boys turn into tired boring boyfriends. They aren't with you because they are so into you- they are with you because that's what they do. They can't stand being alone and they only know how to be with someone else. I asked the relationship boy after he did this that and the third for me after only one date what he'd be doing on this particular night if he weren't helping me.... he said he didn't know. You know why... its because he doesn't have a life outside a relationship! Smh loser.


always&forever

You Are Not Better Than Yourself

Recently I talked to my best friend about my pet peeve with people thinking that they are better than their own lives. I think the only way for you to understand the point I am trying to make are real life experiences and I promise I couldn't make this up if I tried.

1. Elevator Attendant at the Club
Recently I was on the elevator of a popular club and me and my friend got on to ride it when we noticed an opened lipgloss on the floor. Of course we told the attendant because we wouldn't want someone to step on it and it shoot out or they slip sue the club. The attendants response (in a friendly manner): "Man fuck that lipgloss I ain't even trippin on this job, this my little side job people better just watch they step, shit." My response: Blank stare

2. Waiter at the restaurant
Usually I go to restaurants and when I have no clue what I should order I always ask the waiter they prefer or what they think I could get. Last week (again I couldn't make this up) the waiter said: "Aww I would say the salmon but the way I make it at home is way better. I be tryna tell people I'm about to open my own restaurant." My response: "I feel you"

3. Girl That Lives in LA
My friend asked a girl what clubs were popping on Monday nights in Hollywood. Her response: "I only really go to exclusive vip parties and so those parties aren't open on Mondays but try Playhouse or Kress." -_- My thoughts: B*&)^ just say Playhouse or Kress

4. Publicist Trying to get Hired
After a successful event a friend wanted to meet up with a potential publicist to talk over partnering so he asked the potential publicist (who has been begging to get hired) what days work for him. His response: "Any day just not Friday through Sunday because I got A LOT of big parties that weekend so I'm gonna be all booked up those days." Why not just say anytime after Sunday?

5. Guy Passing out Flyers
Recently I was walking down the street in BK and of course someone sell something. It happened to be a jewelry store and I needed to get my ring cleaned so I asked did they clean jewelry. His response: "To be honest I don't even be in there worried about what they do I just be tryna get this record deal I got going, I just got this job so my moms could quit trippin." My response: "Oh okay but so do they clean jewelry though?"

Now I truly believe in the upward mobility and knowing your worth in life and when you can do more. However, I also believe that a persons ambitions should not exceed their talents and it is not okay for people to think that they are better than the situations that they have made for themselves. You are who you are. If you don't like it, of course you can change it but do not downplay the reality of things.

always&forever