Realizing You Are Not The Kobe of The Friendship

I really shouldn't be writing this blog seeing to it that I have not one, but two very important finals tomorrow. However, when you have the moment like I did yesterday when you realize that you were the side BEST FRIEND, it's quite hard to continue on in daily routines. It's quite common that people make their roles in a friendship more important than is actually the reality. It's similar to the way in which role players on athletic teams get caught up thinking that they are the star player. This blog seeks to help side best friends and non-Franchise players realize their role on the team, and the options that they have after a result of their realization.



1. The Nickname
If you don't have a nickname like "bestie," "best friend" or some other special terms of endearment that is only between you two, then that means you are really not the best friend. Most of, if not all Franchise players contain unique nicknames that the "rebound guy" just doesn't get: Black Mamba, A I, Steve Franchise, The Diesel, MJ, Bron Bron, Leezy the Hitman, CP3 to name a few. The side best friends don't get enough thought put into them to have nicknames and I hate to drag Luke Walton through the dirt in my blogs because I have no problem with him, but once again the Luke Walton's of the world do not have nicknames.

2. Getting the Ball In Clutch
I don't know about you, but I adore the moments when my best friends come to me with emergencies -needing me to save the day. If you are never the "go to" person in you're supposed best friends life, than the truth is you are not the main best friend (you are the side friend who gets the left over story after the real best friend already saved the day). Same goes in sports with star players. If you are not given the ball when down by 2 with 10 seconds on the game clock you are not the star player. And if you refer to my blog a few weeks ago being written in as the person who "puts back" Kobe's 3-pointer then that definitely does not count as star player material.

3. Put On A Pedal stool
One of the secret truths about best friends is that we find something in them that we absolutely admire and adore uniquely enough to add the "best" in front of friend. So if your best friend doesn't think that you are one of the top 5 coolest people of all time then you ARE NOT THE BEST FRIEND. He or she might not outright say it, but you know that your best friend thinks you are the coolest of the cool for whatever stunt you did in 4th grade or your ability to keep a room full of people entertained or whatever. If you don't feel that confidence with your best friendship then you wanna know why... its because you aren't the best friend. This is obvious with star players... I mean Kobe can stay in the gym and take some shots extra shots up and people report on it like he is the first person to ever have done such a thing.

4. On the Flip, They Are Your Biggest Critic
If your best friend doesn't have you fucked up at least once a month then guess what.... it ain't ya best friend. A part of being on that pedal stool is that your best friend expects the world from you and as soon as you seem like you're slipping you're best friend is there to catch you but also let you know you're tripping. If you think back and you're best friend has never checked you about a statement you made, outfit you wore, boy/girl you almost dated, or stupid mistake you made then its for sure because you are not the main best friend but in addition to that its because that person is too busy doing all these things with his/her main best friend. Same with non star athletes. Do you think Doc Rivers really cares if Avery Bradley understood the new play? Exactly... Avery who?

5. The World Can Vouch
This might seem a bit cliche but the main best friend knows that he or she is the main best friend because no matter where he/she goes people are constantly reminding you of you're best friendship. As the side best friend you get some acknowledgment of course, its like being a part of a crew. Yes on occasion people are gonna ask Beyonce if she seen Kelly recently, but it's like no matter what someone is going to ask her where her best friend/lover Jay is. The same as if the Lakers are making a public appearance somewhere... people wanna know if Kobe is coming. Side best friends, if you're best friend is out and no one is asking about you then you are not the main best friend. Vice verse if you are out and the whereabouts of your best friend never come up its because you need to find a real best friend.

So Who Are You?
Now being a best friend is tricky because you can have these different entities and still end up as the side best friend. That happened to me. It's like being Ray Allen: You may get asked about all the time whenever the team steps out, have the whole nickname thing going (Jesus Shuttlesworth, Ray Ray) , get the ball in clutch on any given night, and get favored and criticized by a huge fan base but at the end of the day Ray Allen knows that if there is only one jersey and both he and Pierce forgot theirs at home.... guess what Ray Ray... you gotta sit this one out. It's a cold world because on other teams in the past and even today Ray Ray is in fact the main player. Just as some side best friends can for sure be the Kobe Bryants of other friendships, however the day when you find out that you are the Luke Walton or the Ray Allen of the team ( and don't get it confused because being Ray Allen is a worlds better than being Luke but when you think you are the Micheal Jordan) it is a really hurtful day.

Your Next Step
Now if you are on a team like the Celtics and you kinda already did the whole star player/main best friend thing then being the Ray Allen next to a Paul Pierce is not that bad. However, if you feel like a Ray Allen but after reading this blog you now know you are getting the Luke Walton treatment I'd say take advantage of your free agency and find a team that appreciates you. However, if you are Luke Walton, putting up Luke Walton numbers, just be happy that you get to be around players like Kobe Bryant and hey at least you get a front row seat to the finals every year.

Things That Make Me Happy 101

Usually my blogs are funny, but in light of finals week and lots of studying I though I'd do a fun blog that could guide me during this rough next couple of weeks on what makes me happy. I encourage everyone to do the same. Also this is a helpful tool for all the people in my life that want to make me happy. If you follow this guide I think you'll be successful. Especially you! You know who you are=)

1. When people offer me some of their food -TWICE.
My dad was really strict about me eating other peoples food as a little kid because of whatever reasons so it has been instilled in me to say "No" the first time around. However, I usually really wanna try it so when people offer me again, idk why but I get extremely happy. I might still say no but I appreciate the second offer. This applies to other things as well.

2. Terms of Endearment
This should not be limited to that special guy in your life. I absolutely love when my girlfriends say things like "sweetie" or "love" in fact I call most of my best friends "baby girl" on a regular. Its something about it that just makes me feel super loved. For guys that I don't like "like that", or that I'm not super close to its sort of a fine line however I've witnessed it done right so it can either be really weird (and I'm good about making sort-of awkward things VERY awkward) or it can be something that's just really nice and funny. For guys I really like there is no limit to the happiness that a single "Hey baby" text every now and then will lead to.

3. When people take it to the next level before I can
Sorry, I was always the kid that took it there when it didn't need to be taken there. For instance, one of my teachers said the N word to show a point to the class so of course I had to go to the principals office and get everyone's favorite teacher fired. -_- I did not know I was "taking it there" I usually think I'm acting accordingly. Therefore I love being around people that always take it to that next level in laughter, love, stories etc. Usually what we refer to now as "extra" but I love when people are passionate about things and take it up a notch... and since its usually me I get so happy when someone does it first!

4. Starburst & Skittles
No matter what is going on in my life I will not turn down a starburst or a handful of skittles=)

5. When people tell me random reasons they were thinking of me
Call me vain but I love when people think of me for any sort of reason. Even when stories start out as "Tell me why this one annoying girl reminded me of you" or "I broke my wristband and as soon as it happened I thought of you" I still appreciate that I was thought about. And yes I have heard a story like these: to the girls defense what she did was not really that annoying and the wristband was getting worn too much so it was bound to break sooner or later.

6. Organized Fun
I am the kid that likes to organize the fun. Any of my friends that have spent countless hours with me know that after a while I will make the random stuff we are doing into an activity. When people succumb to this I get extremely happy. Its the teacher in me. So if I try and do timed study breaks, or "lets see how long this takes", and "Oh bet if we tried it like this" know that these are all apart of my organized fun. =) Some of my friends hate this but if you play along with me once in a while I'll be forever grateful!

7. Calling me Big Booty Franny
Okay this nickname is fairly new but ANY of my friends that know me know how much I love how big my booty is. By telling me any compliment associated with it I will smile enormously and then "drop it like its hot" to "show you what I'm working with!" (did you catch the meta-narrative?)

Okay this is all I can think of now but I will be sure to update this list all week for those of you who want to make me happy or just laugh, or both! And friends please don't contact me saying..."you always do this..." because duh... these are the things that make me happy!

always&forever